I came across a funny pregnancy Q&A on the internet that I think I've seen in e-mails too. I'll share some of the ones I like best after my appointment update.
I'm just a couple of days shy of 38 weeks today. There is no real progress to report, but the doctor said that with how soft my cervix is, the "practice" contractions I've been having could get things moving along soon. Or we could be waiting another 2-3 weeks. That's the great part about all of this. No one can predict anything, except for maybe Jacob. I'm expecting that he'll wake up one morning and let me know that Baby Sister is coming. At least I know it's not today. I was concerned when he woke up at 5:30 this morning, but he must have just been worried that he would miss the sunrise.
OK, now for the funny stuff. You might not find it as funny as I do, but that's too bad.
Q. Should I have a baby after 35?
A. No, 35 children is enough.
Q. When will my baby move?
A. With any luck, right after he finishes high school.
Q. The more pregnant I get, the more often strangers smile at me. Why?
A. 'Cause you're fatter than they are.
Q. My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A. So what's your question?
Q. My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A. Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.
Q. Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A. Yes, pregnancy.
Q. What does it mean when a baby is born with teeth?
A. It means that the baby's mother may want to rethink her plans to nurse.
Q. Do I have to have a baby shower?
A. Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.
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Grandpa Tom has it all figured out and based on his theory that all of his grandaughters are born on the second. So mathematically the birth date will be the 20 th of February. We all know that 0 is just a place holder. This date is also substantied by the SWAG system.
ReplyDeleteIt's really sad that we had to look up what SWAG means. We thought it was actually some type of math procedure.
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